Team Profile: Brazil

Probable starting XI: Dida, Cafu, Lucio, Juan, R . Carlos, Emerson, Ze Roberto, Kaka, Ronaldinho, Adriano, Ronaldo.

The 25 Possibly Essential Constituents/Outcomes to Brazil's campaign (in non-chronological order):

• At least one 4-0 victory
• Emerson
  
• At least one striker scoring 6-goals
• Ronaldinho
• At least one failed defensive clearance with a bicycle-kick (Roberto Carlos is less than optional on this one.
• Sexy Brazilian samba babes (woo hoo)
• Dida
  
• At least one fluke free-kick/moment of brilliance
• Lucio
  
• At least one red card offence by a key-player during a crucial match
• Roberto Carlos
  
• At least one upcoming superstar unearthed (although, 2-3 is a more likely number)
• At least one defensive midfielder will lose his starting place by the next World Cup (Gilberto Silva and Kleberson anyone?)
• Kaka
• At least two 3-0 victories
• Juan
  
• At least losing one game to an unfancied opponent
• Ronaldo
  
• At least one penalty shootout win
• Ze Roberto
  
• At least one player touted by Pele as the next errr ... him?
• Cafu
  
• At least one player touted by the media as the next Pele
• Adriano
• Winning the cup

Most likely to beat up a referee: Actually, none. What happened to the referee-destroying days of Romario and Edmundo? This bunch are absolute pansies in comparison.

Most likely to miss in a penalty in a shootout: None too. Except maybe Juan. Only because I don't know who he is.

Most likely to get a bigger contract after the tournament: Juan! Why? Because the rest already have big contracts silly.

Most likely to retire after the tournament: Cafu. Any older and he will be a hundred years old. Plus, lifting a World Cup is not a bad way to ciao.

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