Big Balls

Do you hear that gentle lull? The one you can hear only because no one is saying anything about David Beckham.

Golden Balls has not had the massive PR vomit trail that accompanies England's entrance into a major tournament. In other words, no ugly feet shots and call for prayers. I guess 5-years on, Three Lion fans have all but accepted the notion that Greece match form-pre 2002 is never going to repeat itself.

So they've ignored him and moved on to the other great hopes. Gerrard with his bullish candor, Lampard behind a typically inspiring season with Chelsea and of course, Rooney, possibly the only player who exudes the type of deadliness and efficiency that you would come to expect from South America, not Merseyside.

But Beckham has been quietly dispatching the crosses in behind the pundits' back. His lofty standings on the La Liga assists list is proof that the crosses have not gone less deadlier, but the gossip columns have certainly cooled.

I can't imagine it's easy being a 30-year old England captain playing at wide-right these days. As pathetic as the country may be in producing left-sided players, the last two season have seen the arrival of two mercurial right-wingers. While Shawn Wright-Phillips may have seen his bench-warming season at Chelsea come cum laude with his omission from the final squad, 18-year old nippy little sucker Aaron Lennon has been doing brisk business on the right.

Pansy voiced or not, Beckham's Alamo has arrived. From here, it can only be up seeing as the nation has resigned him to scrapping the dirty bottom of ugly failure.

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