"I did not provoke him, I responded verbally to a provocation," Materazzi told the daily Gazzetta dello Sport on Tuesday.

"We both spoke and I wasn't the first. I held his shirt but don't you think it is a provocation to say that 'if you want my shirt I will give it you afterwards'? I replied to Zidane that I would prefer his sister, that is true. I brought up his sister and that wasn't a nice thing, that is true,' said Materazzi."

Okay I don't know which ding donging planet Marco crash landed from but Zidane's supposed line of sin just doesn't sound like much to me. It would be like me saying 'thank you' to the butcher for my pound of meat and have him call me an insensitive prick and proceed to drag me to the middle of the street and bat me over the head constantly with a T-bone axe.

But then again football is starting to make less and less sense. Just ask Jermain Defoe why he missed out on the World Cup after scoring two good goals against Andorra.

No sense man. And I love it.

[get this widget]